The Best Way to Break Up
Ah, Jimmy. He really did know how to treat a woman. I saw the following tweet below by Jim Norton,
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BelchSpeak
I can't believe that came from your mouth!
You’re Fired!
Stupid Girl Rearends Truck While Texting- Now Parents Demand Tougher Laws
Taylor Sauer was a pretty little thing- but boy was she stupid. She was posting a status update to her
Read MoreStunned and Heartbroken- Andrew Breitbart Dead
Andrew Breitbart was a personal hero and an inspiration to me. He was a staunch conservative who fought back against
Read MoreReason 768 to HomeSchool: Spanish Teacher Won’t Rape Your 8th Grader
Yet another idiot teacher who spends four years in college just to get a teaching degree so she can go
Read MoreReason 610 to HomeSchool: Spanish Teacher is a Puta Violador
Lisa Kays ran the Spanish club at her High School in Oklahoma city and she used that oportunity to rape
Read MorePossum Pirouette of Doom!
A washed up ballerina and actress was driving in Los Angeles and spotted an injured possum. The crazy woman left
Read MoreWhitney Had Two Crappy Bodyguards
Whitney Houston, a washed-up singer and actress, got blitzed on booze at a Hollywood party, then swallowed a few Xanax
Read MoreMicron’s CEO Steve Appleton Rides the “John Denver Experience”
Steve Appleton’s company Micron sure did make some good memory chips. And it earned Steve enough dough to allow him
Read MoreUnemployed Again
It was the first day on my new job and I was all excited to get to drive the bobcat.
Read MoreFDA Sued By Stupid Scientists Who Can’t Read
The FDA used its sophisticated network monitoring tools to reconstruct emails and documents sent via an external unauthorized email account,
Read MoreSymantec to Customers: Only a Fool Would Use PCAnywhere Now
Symantec released a whitepaper that quickly glosses over that they were pwn3d back in 2006 and lost the source code
Read MoreRIP Dick Tufeld
Lost in Space was a show that hit reruns when I was a child, and they both fascinated and terrified
Read MoreCanadian Web Developer Sentenced to Death in Iran
Saeed Malekpour is a web developer and an Iranian citizen who was living in Canada and trying to become a
Read MorePotHeads Win: Gabbie Giffords Quits Congress
Gabrielle Giffords, a Democrat, bravely fought back against her debilitating gunshot wound and is this week resigning from Congress. She
Read MoreKim Jong Il is so Ronerie
Somewhere today Sean Penn is crying crocodile tears over the death of one of his favorite dear leaders. Thanks to
Read MoreDon’t Hire Blonde Technicians
Mikko pointed out this ridiculous photo he stumbled across today. A blonde woman, wearing safety glasses is stooped over an
Read MoreRapper Slim Dunkin Gunned Down in Front on 13 Witnesses- No One Snitches
What?? A rapper gunned down in a rap music studio? The hell you say! But its true. Rapper Slim Dunkin
Read MoreCity Union Members Use Witchcraft in Negotiations
A Santeria Birdseed plot has resulted in one non-union idiot being fired and another one in hot water. From the
Read MoreOccupy WallStreet Now Chanting: Bring Out Your Dead!
The corpses are piling up at Occupy Wall Street Tent Cities across this great land. Most of the deaths are
Read MoreTaiwanese Animators Explain Joe Paterno
I was asked yesterday why I haven’t covered anything about the Penn State pedophilia. My response was that I really
Read MoreBill Keane Lowers the Big Top on Family Circus
Bill Keane, the longtime artist behind the Family Circus comic strip has died. Gary Larsen has some parting advice for
Read MoreRapper Heavy D Died of the Heavy P or Heavy C
A rapper was struck down on the streets in LA in broad daylight? The Hell you say! But its true.
Read MoreI Hear GWAR Has an Opening in the Band
Flattus Maximus is not Rottus Maximus. From the Dailymail here: Cory Smoot, lead guitarist of the heavy metal band GWAR
Read MoreThe Biggest News From Yesterday: Herpes Monkey Eaten by Tiger!
Sure some tinhorn dictator was blown away in an epic insurrection, but did you hear about the animal hoarder who
Read MoreHertz Fires Lazy Muslims
In Seattle, the job of driving the dirty rental cars to the carwash and then back to the lot is
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