The Danish Ball Cutting Fish

If any swimmers are going to get their balls cut off by a fish with an overbite this summer, it might as well be the Swedes. It seems that the Pacu is somehow invading Swedish and Danish waters, and it getting a bit nippy. Rumor has it they love to go for the ballsacs of naked Swedish men swimming in cold water.

From Foxnews here:

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water, a cousin of the piranha reported to go after swimmer’s testicles has been found in coastal waters between Sweden and Denmark. And fish experts are warning locals to stay aware — in order to stay whole.

“They bite because they’re hungry, and testicles sit nicely in their mouth,” Carl added.
Yikes!

The creature in question is a red-bellied pacu, and is native to the Amazon. Pictures of the freaky fish frequently make the rounds of inboxes because of its strangely human-looking teeth.

The toothy chomper Lindgreen found was just 8 inches long, but the fish can grow to weigh as much as 55 pounds.

Though its teeth are used mainly to crush nuts and fruits, the pacu eats other fish and invertebrates and there have been some reports of human attacks. In Papua New Guinea, the invasive species has reportedly earned a reputation as the “ball-cutter” after castrating a couple of local fishermen, LiveScience said.

Wow, to be able to be a journalist and be able to be paid for a story like this must be a dream come true. “I once wrote about a fish that cuts your nuts off!” he would exclaim to an uninterested blonde in a bar. Then to show some real brains, he’d whip out his latin name, “It’s called the Pedophilius Testoculatus you know!” Then she’d throw a drink in his face, and the bartender would tweet the after-photos.

And after seeing this photo, Nancy Pelosi introduced a bill to get Pacu fish free orthodontry.