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Re-educating My Child About Earth Day

Walking my kindergartner home from school today I asked him if he learned about Earth Day. He said, “Yep! We are supposed to pick up trash today.”

I replied, “Oh no we don’t. We pay people to pick up trash. We don’t litter, but we don’t pick up trash either. Its not our job.”

“Yes it is! They told us that in school!” he insisted.

So I told him the story of the Earth Day founder Ira Einhorn. I made him repeat the name back to me. He did. I went on to explain to him how he was a very bad man who killed his girlfriend and stuffed her in a box and ran away from Police for thirty years.

He asked me, “Did he kill her with a sword?”

I had to think. I didn’t describe the horrible way Ira Einhorn, the Unicorn killer, kept his girlfriend’s corpse in a box, but told him “Yep, sure. Killed her with a sword. Do you think we should celebrate anything that this evil man told us to celebrate?”

“No Way!” he screamed with enthusiasm. And then he made up his own story about a bad person who stuffed someone in a box, proving to me that the story had sunk in. We don’t celebrate Earth Day or any other secular earth-worshipping event in our home. Teachers can try to indoctrinate my child, and I have to use truth and facts to set him straight.

Dr. Jones

Do not talk about fight club. Oops.

2 thoughts on “Re-educating My Child About Earth Day

  • Earth day was “created” by a group of people called “The Earth Day Network”. Ira Einhorn was a monster of a person, but in no way should it reflect on Earth Day as a whole. Its a very popular logical fallacy called guilt by association. Besides, Earth Day was a proposal by Gaylord Nelson. If you are going to teach your son inaccuracies about a past event, you should go for something less researchable. There is a good chance when he grows up, he will be able to call you out on your misinformation.

  • No, it reflects quite well with Earth Day. Gaylord Nelson was also a rampant believer in the population explosion and gleefully cheered when babies were aborted. Especially the black ones. So Earth Day will be taught to my kid as both a “Stuff your dead girlfriend in a box day” and “Abort Black Babies Day!” Thanks for the reminder Bill.

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