Bear Bitchslaps Man

In Florida, even the bears are crazy. One man who lives near some large national wildlife refuges in Central Florida was leaving food out for the bears. One day he opened the door and was bitchslapped by one bear because there weren’t enough berries on his Honey Bunches of O’s.

From WTSP here:

A central Florida man who opened his door and was slapped by a bear has pleaded no contest to a charge of feeding wildlife.

Forty-nine-year-old Ernest Stamm was fined $200 and ordered to serve six months’ probation on Tuesday.

In December, he told authorities he opened his door and something swiped him across the face. When emergency crews arrived, they found a bear in his front yard. Stamm was treated at a hospital for cuts to his face and released.

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission captured a bear suspected of being the one in Stamm’s yard the next day and euthanized it.

I call these incidents a “cuddlefail.” You feed the bears and you usually get yourself and the bear killed.