The Wind-Up Vibrator for Hippie Chicks

What does going green mean to that smelly hippie chick who only showers twice per week (three minutes each!), vegan to the core, and even uses reusable tampons? Why it means that you must have a dildo made from recycled soda bottles that you have to wind up! After all, no man is going to bang this beast, and that Hippie Chick sometimes wants to have some sustainable sexual pleasure.

From the AFP here:

When world leaders in Copenhagen argue for days in knife-edge talks to save the planet, what more fitting way to relieve the tension than an environmentally-friendly vibrator?

The global sex toy industry is worth an annual 15 billion dollars (22 billion euros), and uses up a mountain of batteries in the process, many of which end up as toxic waste.

But now one Irish company reckons they’ve got the solution to shake up the market: a vibrator they are calling the world’s first-ever “green technology sex toy”.

The Earth Angel, described as “eight inches (20 centimetres) with a sleek white finish”, is a wind-up vibrator which comes with a handle built into the bottom.

“You just flip out the handle, grab a hold of it there, and you just wind it, so for four minutes of doing that, you should generate enough power to give you 30 minutes of full-on, right-to-the top vibrations.”

I somehow don’t think that women are going to take well to handcranking their dildo. But then again, maybe it will strengthen their hands to the point they can open their own pickle jars. Too bad you couldn’t invent a toy that got charged by stirring a wooden spoon in a pot or by the rotary motion of drying a dish!