Parental Rite of Passage: First Trip to Chuck E. Cheese

My babysitter’s three year old daughter was having a birthday and invited my 15-month old son to Chuck E Cheese on a Saturday for pizza, games, and cake. I jumped at the chance to go, and ended up treating it as a boy’s day out.

Pro Tip Number One:  Don’t go to the Cheese on a Saturday.  It was mega crowded.  Kids were running everywhere, and the air conditioner was overworked so it was about 85 in the arcade.  On the plus side, little kids like to abandon cups of tokens.  I treated those opportunities to teach my kid about recycling, or “finders keepers.”

Pro Tip Number Two:  Pizza that tastes crappy to an adult tastes equally crappy to a toddler.  Not only did he spit it out, he blew raspberries to show his utmost disdain for the cheese-covered cardboard.  We had to actually leave early because he was hungry.

Pro Tip Number Three:  Other kids get really pissed when a one year old runs up to the skeeball/whack-a-mole/shooting gallery and steals the tickets that come out of the machine.  I had to apologize to one kid who got in a tug of war with my toddler and lost.

Pro Tip Number Four:  There is so little for toddlers to do at Chuck E’s that it is hardly worth going.  Unless of course you have someone there to watch your kid while you have a pitcher of beer.