Eeny Meeny Miney Moe. Tigers Eat Drunk Stoners by the Toe.

Now I feel bad that the tiger at the San Francisco Zoo was killed since he was only meting out jungle justice.

Tigers love to attack stoners.

The three morons attacked by the tiger on Christmas day, Paul and Kulbir Dhaliwal, and Carlos Sousa Jr, were all stoned, drunk, and standing on the railing around the Tiger pit taunting and calling the Tiger names. As they left, the tiger pounced on them from the bushes. Rawr!

From the AP here:

One of the three victims of San Francisco Zoo tiger attack was intoxicated and admitted to yelling and waving at the animal while standing atop the railing of the big cat enclosure.

Paul Dhaliwal, 19, told the father of Carlos Sousa Jr., 17, who was killed, that the three yelled and waved at the tiger but insisted they never threw anything into its pen to provoke the cat.

“When they got down they heard a noise in the bushes, and the tiger was jumping out of the bushes on him (Paul Dhaliwal),” the documents said.

Toxicology results for Dhaliwal showed that his blood alcohol level was 0.16 — twice the legal limit for driving, according to the affidavit. His 24-year-old brother, Kulbir, and Sousa also had alcohol in their blood but within the legal limit, Matthews wrote.

All three also had marijuana in their systems. Kulbir Dhaliwal told police that the three had smoked pot and each had “a couple shots of vodka” before leaving San Jose for the zoo on Christmas Day.

Police found a small amount of marijuana in Kulbir Dhaliwal’s 2002 BMW, which the victims rode to the zoo, as well as a partially filled bottle of vodka.

You know those stupid Anti-drug commercials for Pot? They should make one showing the kids getting eaten by tigers. That would be hilarious.