Huckabee Shenanigans

I just don’t understand why Mike Huckabee has rocketed up to the tops of the polls for the Republican primaries. First, he is rather bald up top. I have written before that bald candidates just don’t do well. Remember the last bald President who was elected? Eisenhower. Gerry Ford doesn’t really count since he stepped into his slot when Nixon quit.

Secondly, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am sick of idiot Governors from Arkansas hogging the national spotlight. And that goes quadruple for the idiot Governors’ wives! Arkansas is one of the most backwards states in the Union. The only place you can get a drink is Little Rock and Hot Springs. I don’t trust any state that won’t have a beer with you.

And thirdly, Huckabee was passing out get out of jail free cards like he was selling crack in Little Rock. He even gave one to a rapist who went on to murder a woman! I mean seriously, aren’t the Republicans supposed to be tough on crime? According to this ABC story here, any pastor only had to ask Huckabee to spring a guy from the joint, and he was given clemency.

And today is the straw that broke the camel’s back. As a scout, Huckabee’s son David supposedly took a stray dog and hung it from a tree to kill it. I was in scouting for a few minutes, and I must have missed the part about dog-killing to get a merit badge. So lets pass on this Huckabee pack of hicks and get on to electing someone with some sensible hair.