Fools and Their Money

I already know that people in Louisiana are DUMB.  They can’t get out of the way of a hurricane with 3 days warning.  They produced Britney Spears.  They like to suck the heads off of crawfish.  But this latest story boggles the mind when you ponder the depths of their stupidity.

Brent Finley took 800 Thousand dollars from stupid people in Louisiana.  He convinced them that his wife could control a secret CIA satellite and would diagnose all of thier ills from space.  If they turned up to be sick, CIA agents would break into their homes while they slept and inject them with medicine to cure them.

From the AP here:

A man was sentenced to more than four years in prison for bilking friends and family out of more than $800,000 by convincing them that his wife was a government agent who could arrange to have their medical problems diagnosed by satellite imaging.
 
Brent Eric Finley, 38, of Rayville, was sentenced in federal court in Monroe to serve 51 months in prison. His wife, Stacey Finley, was sentenced in August to spend 63 months in prison and both are ordered to jointly pay restitution in the amount of $873,786.94.

The couple convinced numerous people that Stacey Finley was a CIA agent and with her contacts she could schedule a medical scan of the victims’ bodies by satellite imaging that would detect any hidden medical problems.

The Finley’s convinced their victims that, if any medical problems were found, secret agents would administer medicine to them as they slept in exchange for payment.

How stupid do you have to be to think that the CIA provides healthcare from space?  How bad is the healthcare in Louisiana to make someone turn to the freakin’ CIA to use space beams to heal you?  How unaffordable is the healthcare to decide to pay thousands for the spacebeams instead of paying for a real doctor? 

Do these yahoos still believe in Santa?  Do they think the CIA agents who break in at night are related to the elves that repair shoes in the middle of the night?  Its no surprise to me that reports of alien abductions tend to come from this state.

For another story of bizarre medical quackery, click here.