Beer Drinking Thief Kidnaps Baby Jesus

You hear about something like this every year: Manger Mauling or Nativity Napping.

From the AP here:

PLAISTOW, N.H. – A homeowner said Friday that whoever stole the baby Jesus from his manger scene was disrespectful by replacing it with an empty beer can. Bob Chooljain said that the Jesus figure was stolen from the manger scene on Wednesday night.

“You just wonder, what was in the person’s mind that actually did that? What was the reason for it? Why leave the beer can? What’s the connection?” said Chooljain, doesn’t want to press charges.

Chooljain said he will replace the illuminated figure with another doll for the time being.

So I guess the stealing of the baby Jesus was okay, but leaving the empty can of beer was disrespectful? I’d say so too. A full beer would be closer to a fair trade.

I guess he could always drive nails through the baby Jesus’ hands and feet to keep it in its manger, but that would probably create some sort of Christian Holiday Time Paradox by co-mingling the holidays.